What Consumes Your Mind, Controls Your Life
“What consumes your mind, controls your life.”
What you decide to obsess over in your mind, ruminating … reviewing … rewinding … will ultimately be what controls you.
It will be the CENTER SCREEN of your life.
And unless you change your mind – and change the channels – you will continue to see the frustrating flicker of that thing, that face, that obsession because you can’t seem to move past whatever it is that has a hold on you.
If you are nodding your head, you have been there – or you are there right now. You know what focus has taken control of your thoughts, your dreams and your decisions. And deep down, you know that you know that you know that you need to find a way to push it away … push it out of the control tower of your mind.
You feel your energy being depleted and your time being sucked away, but for some reason you have held on. And it just might be the biggest secret you are carrying around. When you are honest with yourself, however, you know none of it is good for you at all. Not one bit. In fact, it is hurting you time after time after time.
It is taking over your heart, hijacking your once vibrant mind and eclipsing the creative energy that used to flow from your soul. And likely someone close to you has said, “Do you realize how much time you spend talking about that/him/her/them?”
If you can take a step back and look – truly LOOK – at the energy that this THING is taking from your life, you are ready to get honest. Is it really worth your valuable energy? And – here is the real question – is it REALLY something you can fix?
My guess is: NO.
You know the issue. Your spirit is calling you to let go of the burden of trying to solve something that is unsolvable, and your body is aching to step out of the stagnant quicksand and start walking again with liberation. It is up to you today whether or not you are going to make the move.
Take a minute to turn to a mirror and look yourself dead in the eye.
Speak the name of that thing, that person, that obsession that you are ready to stop letting control your life. Say it out loud and acknowledge that it is there. If you are ready for a change, you are right where you need to be.
Staring at your beautiful eyes, tell yourself “I am not letting ______________ control my soul anymore.”
Then take several moments to get real.
Let yourself review in silence all of the hours, thoughts, actions and emotions that you give ________ on a daily basis. Be mindful about recognizing the depth and breadth of decision-making, planning and stressing that spins in your head throughout your day … and into the night.
Get honest by clarifying its presence in and around you. Let the tears fall with your raw honesty if they need to – this step of recognizing is critical. And difficult. It is the reality that you have agreed to … but now the one that you want to change. So let’s do this thing.
Take a deep breath and decide that you are no longer letting ___________ take up the biggest room in your life’s house.
Tell yourself again. “I am not letting ___________ control my soul anymore.”
Say it as many times as you need to. Sit with your decision and let yourself feel whatever you are feeling. There can be a range of emotions and they are all right on time. They are there for a reason and necessary to walk through.
Come back when you are ready and let’s talk about the plan.
It’s going to be a challenge, but it is up to you, and you CAN shake this thing.
Will it go away easily? No. Will it try to knock on your door during all of the same times that it did yesterday and last week? Yes. Will you have to be purposeful about changing the channel, shutting the door and pushing it off your front porch? Yes. Yes. Yes.
But you can.
Next time it pops into your head (which is right now), picture yourself getting rid of it in some action that feels final to you, like tying it into a trash bag and throwing it into space, telling yourself it is irretrievable once hurled into the stars (this is the one I use). And each time your mind tries to open that trash bag up, remind yourself, “Nope, can’t open it, can’t see it, can’t dwell on it because it is tied up inside a bag in outer space out of my reach. Too bad, self – move on.”
And see yourself unable to pull the bag down. Gone. Can’t go there.
Do this every time you are reminded to focus on the stress of _______ again and again and again. Each time, turn your thoughts toward something that you know is GOOD for you: that project you love, your children’s smiles, your artistic skills, your favorite vacation memory, that wall that you are painting your favorite color. Then move your energy.
By doing so, you will stop your body from automatically producing stress-inducing cortisol and instead retrain your system to release endorphins that are healing and uplifting. You will teach yourself that you actually DO have control over the focus of your mind and energy … and always will.
Keep repeating the message to yourself, keep envisioning that bag floating in outer space and keep changing those channels in your mind. You will be amazed by how much more energy you have, how much more productive your life becomes and how much happier your spirit feels to float again with energy of its own freedom.